Terrible Twos – Truth or Over Exaggeration.

So you’ve all heard it by now. Whether you’re a parent or not. When your child hits two years old they will see the full moon and turn into a right little shit; but is this truth or is this just a myth or an over exaggeration of development and learning.

In my personal experience, when Lillith hit 2 years old she was still a very well-behaved little girl. It started a few months after that… she suddenly developed an attitude and unwillingness to listen to a word that we said. Climbing on everything, playing with switches, throwing toys and herself sometimes. The paddies and tantrums came in strong (not too often but when they came we just let her ride them out). Her least favourite word to hear became “NO” and her favourite word to say also became “NO”. Even with her ears sealed tight shut she still managed to hear certain words like “biscuit” how bizarre is that? Although at times she can really get under my skin I do not believe that she is doing it on purpose or doing it to spite us.
I sway on the side of Over Exaggeration when it comes to The Terrible Twos. In my opinion children react differently to this stage of development and independence. And its doesn’t just apply to only Two Year Olds. We all get angry and frustrated. It is a natural human emotion. Lillith is young and still learning how to control her emotions. She is still learning the ins and outs of everything around her, brain constantly ticking. I would not describe Lillith’s behaviour as unbearable or even terrible.

I have seeked out the help of a few other Bloggers to give us there views on The Terrible Twos.

OneDadsViewThe Terrible Twos don’t exist.  The term was invented to put parents in a state of readiness for the “Threenager”  years!

When our happy-go-lucky smiley Daughter turned two, everyone told us to beware.  But it just didn’t happen for us. She remained happy and content in her weekly routine and moved up a stage at Nursery without any fuss. “It’s all a Myth” we cried whilst at the same time feeling very smug as parents that were obviously winning.

And then it hit……Her third birthday; and almost to the day she changed. All of sudden she forgot how to use her ears. She became a little stroppy.  She forgot how wonderful Cucumber tasted and started retching over spoonfuls of Mashed Potato.  I had the nerve to suggest I do the dishes before playing with her one evening coming in from work.  The drama that ensued was the stuff of legend.

I’m probably over exaggerating a little. She’s still as brilliant as she’s always been but the dynamic definitely changed around that fateful birthday.

Neil – One Dads View

 

I’ve got 4 kids, three of which have been through the notorious ‘terrible twos’. Finlay was awful, but we were new parents (he was number 

1), and Daisy (number 2) was a newborn, so we didn’t really know what we were doing back then! We tried lots of ways to resolve the tantrums but only one worked – time. We let him burn out, then spoke to him about it. On reflection, we talked to him like he was a little grown-up at times, but as I said we were new to parenthood. Daisy was no trouble at all, and Teddy (number 3) was, and at 4 years old still is at times, a pain in the butt! Part of his frustration is because he wants to do everything his older brother and sister does, so we find ourselves constantly reminding him he’s only 4, which only seems to wind him up even more! Making time to spend with just  him on his own doing age-appropriate activities works well. We are hoping Florence (number 4) will be just as chilled out as Daisy.

Depending on what you read, and there’s a lot, it’s mostly about a new-found desire for independence coupled with communication frustration. This is a time when your little one really starts developing a personality, but as I often say, “you can’t put a price on character eh?”

If I could offer 3 pieces of advice it would be this:

  1. Pick your battles – you don’t always have to acknowledge, argue, reason, or even say no.
  2. Patience – be the very definition of it!
  3. Learn about your child’s triggers – you will know in time what sends them off, either avoid it or prepare for it.

Douglas – TeamSteinBlog

 

Now everyone talks about the Terrible Twos as being this horrible phase in your toddler’s life. It’ll be hell on earth they said. Pfft I never believed them – people exaggerating in my opinion. I do recall the eldest being a stubborn thing but not quite the devil in disguise that everyone had warned me about. Everything was a “no” from her. My eldest turned two as my youngest turned 6 months old. So maybe I don’t remember her hitting the Terrible Twos as I had the youngest distracting me? Also, I went back to work full-time roughly the same time so maybe I just missed it all?

Things were different with the youngest. She has just turned 2 in July 2017. She’s a proper little madam! Stubborn and everything is a no but with her it’s accompanied by a horrid temper (just like her Mam!). She’s a right terror and bullies her older sister. There’s a lot of slapping and hair pulling involved. Thankfully no biting nor pinching!

However, I’m still not convinced of the Terrible Twos being a thing. Although I may have just been lucky with mine? I think the more fearful thing I have to contend with is the Second Child Syndrome! 

Rebecca – BecsterDotCom

Lastly I thought it would be nice to ask my Mum to write a little something on the subject too.

Terrible Twos…

Well what can I say…not a lot really. I have 4 boys, Shaun, being my 2nd born, none of them really had the terrible 2’s. Yes we had small amounts of stomping feet & the i’m not doing what you say, I’ll do it my own way but nothing major. The tantrums & stroppyness started between 3 & 4yrs, after starting nursery. Suddenly then they became all grown up & opinionated with right little attitudes!

Shaun on the other hand, he never really had many tantrums, he was quite a quiet & laid back child. He would rather go off & sulk than shout & throw things. Someone once described him as an ‘old soul’.

My 4th born didn’t have many tantrums either, I thought he’d be like Shaun but when he was about 5 & half. Suddenly after a year of starting school, he made up for it all, 18mths later he’s still at it!!!!

Every child is different, if you know what triggers are, you can try & divert it but sometimes it just comes out of the blue for no apparent reason. Oh the joys of parenthood, every day can be a different challenge but I wouldn’t change things for the world, they are my world!!

Mum to 4 boys xx

 

4 thoughts on “Terrible Twos – Truth or Over Exaggeration.”

Leave a comment

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *